When You’re Stressed the F**k Out… Part II

Back in August, I wrote a brief post about being… well let this gif express how I was feeling:

Well things got worse after that and I was feeling… well the following gifs capture how I felt very well:

 

You get the idea. Yes, once again I was stressed the f**k out and I mean all the f**king way out. So much so that I got physically ill! This all happened in October and part of November.  Things were just going haywire, I was frustrated and apprehensive on the thing I’ve been working on, work was cutting my hours, family stuff, finances, and things going on in K-pop community due to cyberbullying.

It was a lot and it wasn’t a fun time for me. I don’t think I’ve ever been that stressed before in my life. Thankfully, I was able deal with the stress in a healthy way and while I’m not extremely stressed as I had been during this time period I’m still a little stressed and anxious.

So I’m back with seven more tips to help alleviate your stress and anxiety:

From WebMD:

Get enough sleep

Six to eight hours is recommended. Our bodies and minds need time to recover from stressful events.

Don’t use alcohol, drugs, or compulsive behaviors to reduce stress.

These things can stress your body even more. You might end up like Sylvester here if you:

Breathe deeply:

“Take a 5-minute break and focus on your breathing. Sit up straight, eyes closed, with a hand on your belly. Slowly inhale through your nose, feeling the breath start in your abdomen and work its way to the top of your head. Reverse the process as you exhale through your mouth.”

From VeryWellMind.com:

Create Artwork

Reconnect with your creative side and draw, paint, or color in a coloring book as all of these can be great stress relievers.

Give yourself a regular pep talk

Instead of speaking negatively about yourself, speak positively.  This can help you develop a healthier outlook on life and can help manage your emotions and take positive action.

Get social support

Having supportive people in your life is essential to managing stress. Reach out to someone in your existing social networks be it a family member, friend, etc. If you don’t have emotional support or friendship you may need to expand your network by joining an organization, attending a support group, or getting professional help.

That being said…

If there are things or people adding to your stress, CUT THEM OUT! 

This is one of the best ways to reduce your stress and give you more peace. Sometimes shitty people come into our lives and we need to cut them off.  We also need to get rid of bad habits and make way for better ones that can help us feel better.

I hope these tips can help you alleviate your stress and anxiety. With the new decade approaching we’re going to need all the help we can get. I wish you love, peace, and health in 2020. Remember your existence is important and I’ll see you soon.

 

 

When You’re Stressed the F**k Out…

Hey everyone hope you’re doing well. Let me ask you something:

Have you ever felt like this?

Or this?

Or maybe even this?

Have you felt the urge to do this:

If so then you’re not alone.  Welcome to the stressed out club. I’ve been stressed out for a few weeks-no scratch that-months now. My current state of oblivion is due to a combination of things: life, family, work, etc… Stress is one of those unfortunate things about life and there are many ways to deal with it-both positive and negative and we don’t want the latter.

So here are five positive ways to relieve stress and anxiety.

Exercise

This is a good way to relieve mental stress.  If you exercise regularly you’ll lower your stress hormones, improve your sleep quality and gain more confidence.

Aromatherapy

Light a scented candle  or Use essential oils. According to Healthline.com, these are some of the most common scents:

  • Lavender
  • Rose
  • Vetiver
  • Bergamot
  • Roman chamomile
  • Neroli
  • Frankincense
  • Sandalwood
  • Ylang ylang
  • Orange or orange blossom
  • Geranium
Write

Jot your thoughts down in a journal. Whether it’s a notebook from Dollar Tree or a kawaii stationary journal, writing can help relieve stress.  Focus on what you’re grateful for or write about what’s troubling you.

Mindfulness

This is an excellent way of combating anxiety-inducing effects of negative thinking. Mindfulness is a series of practices that keep you anchored to the present moment.  Ways to practice mindfulness include yoga and meditation. Here’s a brief list of resources:

Free Audio Resources for Mindfulness Meditation via Mindful magazine

Mindfulness Resources [pdf] via Stanford

Free Resources via The Free Mindfulness Project 

Listen to Relaxing Music

Music is another method to help relieve stress as it can have a very relaxing effect on the body. Slow paced instrumental music is highly recommended.  Here’s a few playlists via Spotify:

Best Relaxation Music

Calming Music

The Most Relaxing Playlist in the World

So how to do you feel? Still stressed? No matter here’s a few more resources for you:

16 Simple Ways to Relieve Stress and Anxiety via Healthline.com

Stress and How to Lower It via Center For Young Women’s Health

1o1 Things To Do When You’re Stressed via Care.com

18 Ways to Calm Down When You’re Stressed – Entrepreneur

I hope this helps.  Have a wonderful weekend and please remember your existence is important. I’ll see you soon..

Three Tips For Dealing With Disappointment

Well folks we’ve finally made it. Tonight 2018 comes to an end and we’ll have survived the second year of the orange troll’s reign in one piece more or less. This year was one full of disappointment in numerous ways.

  • A few of those we stan shocked us with their dismal words and actions, while other people’s problematic faves proved to be too problematic and entered the sunken place choosing to be enslaved to ignorance and mediocrity.
  • A segment of society showed their ass by continuing to act out their racism at the polls while another segment remained shocked and in denial that this was America-even though we know this IS America.  Children and their families have been tear gassed, separated, and abused.
  • Our actions have resulted in Mother Nature giving us wildfires, horrible hurricanes, and other turbulent natural disasters. And we lost some of the best among us great and small…
I miss him.

I could go on but it’s not my intention to sink you further into the mire of this disappointing year. What I want to know is…How are ya’ll feeling? 

Mood

Like it or not disappointment is part of life. Doesn’t matter  whether it’s personal, professional, relationship, etc.  It exists (Read this infographic from  bestpsychologydegrees.org on the psychology of disappointment).  As I stated three sentences ago, disappointment is an inevitable part of our lives, there’s no avoiding it.

So with 2019 looming around the corner, I wanted to  give you a three tips on how to handle disappointment.

1.Understand what’s taken place.

  • Disappointment can either be predictable and preventable or unavoidable and beyond our control.

2. Were our expectations reasonable?

  • Keep it realistic.
  • Did we set the bar too high or too low?
  • Is the outcome what we want?

3. Cope with it in a positive way

  • Channel your energy into other endeavors
  • Reevaluate perception and behavior
  • Redirect our energy and focus on positive solutions
  • Avoid self-loathing, blaming yourself, or blaming others
Here are a few helpful links:

How to Get Back on Track After Disappointing Yourself

4 Steps to Deal with Disappointment

Dealing with Disappointment in Life

11 Ways Emotionally Intelligent People Overcome Disappointment

A Letter To INFJs About Dealing With The Pain Of Disappointment

Feeling better? 

That’s pretty much what I expected. But don’t worry we’ll get there. It might take a while but we’ll get there, I promise.

Whether great or small, when life disappointments come at us how we choose to respond is vital in becoming better people and improving our lives and the world.  As we enter 2019 I hope that when disappointment comes knocking at your door-cause it will come-you’ll be able to weather the storm.  And when you’re feeling down remember:

Until we meet again…

 

 

 

Welcome 2018: My four goals for the new year

Happy New Year everyone!

I hope you had a great start to 2018. As with every new year, there are the new year resolutions that many people make.  Some are kept while others are thrown out like bath water due to various reasons.  Like most of you I’ve created resolutions-or goals  rather-for 2018 that I hope to accomplish.  I’m not going to list them all because some are personal and I rather not air them out in public lest adversaries that come in many shapes and forms disrupt and prevent them from coming to past.  So without further ado, here a few goals for the new year.

  1. Read 20 books for the year.

If you’ve read my previous post , you’ll see that I accomplished my 2017 reading goal of 100 books by reading 127.  This year I wanted to scale back and just read only 10 but doubled my efforts for 20.  Given my track record it’s safe to say that I’ll read at least 20 books in 2018.

                    2. Publish at least 3 books.

After four years of blood sweat and tears,  I was hell bent on publishing my first novel and succeeded in doing so. This year I want to continue to pursue my writing and release more books. I’m close to achieving this goal as I’ve got 2 books ready to go in April (so look forward to that). I think I can rise to the occasion but writer’s fatigue has settled in so we’ll see how I make out.

                 3. Attend a concert and a convention

I have social phobia which means in my experience:

a.  I don’t have friends (I know folks but they’re not friends just acquaintances) which is both a good and bad thing (honestly who wants to hang out with people who don’t care about you?).

b.  And aside from going to work and the occasional trips to the movies, doctor and shul, I don’t go anywhere.

I hope to change that (I’m talking about b. as far as a. goes, I’m to the point in my life where I don’t care about making friends and believe that I’m better off on my own.).

So here’s hoping there’s a convention that invites awesome guests who’ll come so I can venture out and get my picture taken with them (honestly that’s the only reason I go to these things).  Concerts can be hit or miss (mostly miss) as the artists that I love often skip the big city closest to me and head for Tampa, Jacksonville, or Miami.  Last year I got to see Norah Jones so who knows perhaps the odds are in my favor.

                   4. Practice self-care.

Things are rough all over so it’s important to take time out for yourself and do things that help your well being. I hope to do this through a number of ways, and I suggest you do the same. Find activities, books, music, people (if you wanna go that route) etc. that’ll rejuvenate your mind, body, and soul.

I know where you been, where you are, where you goin’
I know you’re the reason I believe in life
What’s the day without a little night?
I’m just tryna shed a little light
It can be hard
It can be so hard
But you gotta live right now
You got everything to give right now

-Logic’s 1-800-273-8255

I hope to accomplish these and other personal goals this year. Wish me luck and I wish you all the best in accomplishing your goals as well.